A LIGHT IN THE DARK
Photo source : me!
If you've ever suffered from clinical depression you'll be familiar with the violent mood swings that condition can sometimes engender. Even from within such an unpleasant situation, however, you can learn something of value that may help you cope with further bouts.
The pattern is well-known : one day you find yourself suffocated by the weight of insurmountable and often contradictory problems, unable to stop the torrent of negative thought in your head, feeling isolated, frustrated, angry, helpless and alienated, not even able to find solace in the activities that normally bring pleasure.
The next day you are on the up swing : the external circumstances of your life haven't changed, but you find yourself calmer and able to delineate a small space of tranquility and gain some measure of respite from your inner turmoil. Warmth has re-entered your life and you find yourself able to smile again.
But the following day you find the cycle repeating as you are once more sucked into the vortex of depression that sometimes feels as if it is physically tearing you apart, such is its intensity.
If you think about it, though, this loop can teach you something that has long been the cornerstone of various stripes of philosophy such as Zen Buddhism and Stoicism. We're not talking about wishy-washy new age notions here, however, just objective facts.
Your life circumstances remain unchanged, while your feelings about them shift from one extreme to the other. What this tells us is that external events themselves do not carry the changing values you ascribe them, rather it is you who superimposes your emotions onto them. That you can feel completely differently about the same things on different days confirms this.
And therein lies the seed of hope. You can arm yourself with the knowledge that it is your mind that is deciding whether an external event is good or bad. And you can control your mind. When the downward spiral begins you can consciously remember what it felt like when you viewed a particular event in a less terrifying light, and even if you can't stop the slide, you can at the least hold on to the echoes of a more positive mood, and ride out the storm safe in the knowledge that it will pass.